MY BRAIN IS MADE OF THINGS MADE OF GOLD

Feb 08

They only report the bad news, never the good news.

The el Bulli menu looks great, but I’m saving my money for Next’s Karova Milk Bar night.

Extrapolating based on the first and second verses, the unreleased third verse of “Last Friday Night” probably involved human sacrifice.

If there’s anything to be learned from this nonsense about gang signs in the Chicago City Sticker it’s this: art education is absolutely necessary.

I mean, forget those arguably-not-really-there gang signs for a minute; those hands are so poorly drawn that I was wondering why we had decided on a design honoring Chicago’s heroic, ethnically diverse, manicured werewolves.

And that skyline. It’s a mess of selective exclusion and impossible perspective.

We gotta start taking arts education seriously or in another five years are city stickers are just going to be poorly-proportioned stick figures.

But seriously.

[video]

Feb 07

The Amazed Obama badge is the perfect way to celebrate all your amazing accomplishments. I’ve already added it to my work email signature.

Now THAT’S how you monetize Tumblr.

No regrets!

[video]

Feb 06

I am never more publicly insincere than when I toss in my “thank you” at the close of a conference call.

How can you tell?

I’ve got my sign-off so well-timed that I basically let the beeBOOP finish the line for me.

Thank beeBOOP.

Modern College Library Editions

“The accumulated filth of all their sex and murder will foam up about their waists and all the whores and politicians will look up and shout ‘Who joined?’ And I’ll look down, and whisper ‘Aaron’”

Every time I call in.

Next year’s GoDaddy Super Bowl commercial is going to be a snuff film selling .biz domains.

Feb 05

“Before he was Dr. Manhattan, he was Mr. Williamsburg.”

I’m not a comics reader by any means but I am a little concerned about the “Before Watchmen” series.

Oh well.

[video]